How to choose a bride? What science has to offer?
By Dr Titus Sankaramangalam - KOCHI
03rd September 2012 12:28 PM
I have an irresistible urge to give uncalled for advice to parents and boys as to how to choose a bride. Luckily for me, most people would listen to this with some curiosity and interest as they would do when they stretch their palm forwards for a palmist to tell the future. Quite a few of my listeners will be very sarcastic, but even they would let me talk for a couple of minutes. Since it will usually be only a minute or two before they throw me out, as you too would soon find out why, I have to be pretty precise and fast. Also, there will be some nasty yet valid comments on why I did not say anything on how to choose a bridegroom. Of course, I have some very useful tips for girls and their parents on this too, but girls tend to prefer more masculine men during the fertile period (the time around ovulation) of the menstrual cycle and more feminine men during other parts of the cycle which makes things a bit complicated. Their preferences can even change when they are looking for a short or long term relationship. Because the advice has to be a bit more individualistic here, I have to leave it out from this general discussion. First commandment: The girl should have an hour-glass figure. Sadly, only eight percent of our girls will have an hour-glass figure. But it is a sign of good health and fertility worth looking for. The waist should only be 70% of her hips. This is irrespective of her weight. Slight variations-60% or 80% are OK, but beyond that it can pose problems in fertility. A girl’s waist is not like her face; just one look and you know whether she has a curvaceous figure or not.
An hour-glass figure means that your child will also be intelligent because the girl will have enough omega three fatty acids on her thighs for the child’s brain development during pregnancy. Second commandment:
The girl should be at least three years younger than the boy. Older boys should have even younger girls-the age
difference should be at least six years. Very old men should marry only very young girls. (Older men even otherwise have a preference for very young girls. The evolutionary significance of this fatal attractionis still not fully understood). Youth is a major determinant of physical attraction and also of fertility. A woman’s chances of getting pregnant dramatically decrease by the late twenties.So, the younger, the better. The cut off line should be 25 years. Third commandment: Go for a girl with only average looks. A study performed by the University of Toronto found that the most attractive facial dimensions were those found in the average female face. A very beautiful girl is a rarity. The chances are that she will be carrying rare and unusual genes and might have an unusual personality trait which may not be agreeable in the long or short run. In short, beauty is not normal. Just keep in mind that an OK girl will be more than OK for you. Fourth commandment: Look for symmetry. Oneside of the body should be a mirror image of the other. This is not only important for the face, but to all other
visible body parts also like breasts, arms, and legs. An easy way to find this out is to look at her elbows to see
whether they are shapely and symmetrical. Large breasts are no good unless they are of the same size and shape. Once again, symmetry is a sign of good health, both physical as well as mental. Fifth commandment: Make a closer look at her face if circumstances permit. Look at her eyes from the front. Large round sparkling
eyes are a sign not only of good looks but also of sociability. Sixth commandment: A small chin and nose will add an infantile look and make a girl cute and adorable. The ideal mouth should be only half (50%) of the face at mouth level. Even a small difference either way could bring down the attractiveness. Seventh commandment: Skin and hair. I am not a racist when I say this, but go for a fair girl--a fair smooth skin to be exact. Even among
black tribes who have never seen a white man or woman, the preference for lighter skin exists. People with
higher social status tend to have fairer skin. “To be both prettiest and black is impossible.’’ But a very fair boy can marry a dark girl with impunity. There will be good genetic mix up in the children. Long and lustrous hair is always welcome. Eighth commandment: The girl should be shorter than you. Girls who are slightly shorter than the average height of the particular women population of that region are the best. Ninth commandment: She should be more intelligent than you if you want the marriage to last. And mind you, educational qualifications are not always a intelligence. Make sure that you talk to her and if she can really make out what an idiot you are, marry
her. But this commandment is only meant for those who wish a long-lasting married life. Boys who are willing to take risks can marry less intelligent ones.
Tenth commandment: If you want the girl to be pretty, look at her lips from the side. I mean, take a side view of her face. See whether the lips are just inside a line drawn from the tip of the nose to the chin-almost touching the line but not exactly touching it. This applies to both the lips. In my experience, my male audience will immediately start looking at the women around them and the women will try to find it out on their own by putting the index finger on their chin and nose, and see whether their lips touch the finger or not. My female audience, who would invariably be unhappy with this last chin-nose finger test, has never let me make any more commandments. (The views in the article are the writer’s own.
Email: drtitusjohn@gmail. com Ph. 91 469 2666757; 91 9447028937).
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Comments(59)
He says i'm not a racist but please choose a gal who's fair! what a wow! i'm amazed to see an article like this being published by Times! I'm sure, without being a doctor by profession, i can tell how to choose a bride or groom.. It just needs some love and some brain to choose your partner and not measuring the distance between the lips, chin, thigh and crap!! My humble request to the Times to please be choosy of articles and not publish anything that is given to you! Please!
Posted by Sera at 09/07/2012 21:39 Reply to this Report abuse
A very entertaining post.
Posted by paddy at 09/11/2012 05:40 Reply to this Report abuse
It worries me that New Indian Express published this. It worries me, that this derisory excuse of an article, is out there to 'educate' equally unaware people out there to further discriminate. It worries me that, journalism and news publishing has gone to dogs. It worries me that we have lost all sense. It worries me, most of all that: soon brides will be burnt for not having an hourglass figure or symmetrical breasts or child-bearing hips. I am looking for a stronger word than 'Ridiculous'.
Posted by Vishnupriya Bhandaram at 09/11/2012 16:00 Reply to this Report abuse
What was the writer thinking while writing this and how did something so atrocious get published in the mainstream media. Maybe the author was out to buy cows - where you need to check the limbs and teeth etc - while he was writing about bride hunting. I've never read such a disgusting post in recent times.
Posted by Sangeetha at 09/11/2012 16:32 Reply to this Report abuse
Lots of female readers have been bitterly aggravated by this of that I am sure. But having said that, ladies please see the humor in this... its a long list of things in the "not to do" list. Not the "to do" list. Try and understand that its not possible to weigh a woman's thigh to understand how brsiny your un-born child will be. I found it quite humorous. Cheers!
Posted by SUSMIT at 09/11/2012 18:40 Reply to this Report abuse